Insecurities Are Knocking, Courage Required, Now Answer.
Let’s talk about insecurities.
Jackasses that they are. Seriously.
These fools want to show up + show out at the most inopportune times. Yet, if we take a moment to think a little deeper about them, they are able to provide us with knowledge we wouldn’t otherwise seek. Do you know how necessary they are along our journey through life?
I am unable to speak for anyone else, I know they serve a purpose in my life; my insecurities have taught me so much about myself.
I reached a point where I decided I can either keep trying to shut the door in their faces, or I can invite them in; either way they don’t seem to be going anywhere anytime soon. I’ve looked back and observed moments I had unknowingly been stuck due to my insecurities, until I finally decided to take some time to acknowledge their existence; come face to face with them. Literally asking, who the hell do you think you are, all up in my business? I’m over here doing my thing and here you come running interference. Why are you here?
[ctt template=”3″ link=”afd5U” via=”no” ]Well let me tell you, your insecurities have answers to the intimate questions you want to know about yourself. [/ctt] They will gladly tell you, I’m here because you are not loving yourself enough. I’m here because you’re not taking care of yourself. I’m here because you are being self destructive. I’m here because you are allowing fear to run your life. The humor for me? My thoughts then say, I know I asked but I wasn’t actually expecting the answers to be so harsh, the disrespect. I’d much rather you just remain silent, so I can keep moving the way I want to move, okay? I didn’t really expect to have to deal with the root of the issue right now. Awareness is one of those things in life that once seen, no matter how hard you try, you are not able to unsee.
Insecurities will keep showing up in our lives. They are the true definition of leeches latching on for dear life when you least expect + most certainly when you’d least appreciate them to; when all you really want is to be left alone while living your best life possible. Right?
Truth, insecurities are content with causing pain, they have absolutely no problem stabbing you with a knife right in the back and bringing you to your knees.
Now, let’s take a moment to breathe and accept the very real purpose of their existence is to speak truths. The kind of truths that we would often rather not have to hear from anyone else, let alone ourselves. When we ask ourselves why we would willingly welcome in pain; why we should speak to our insecurities when we know for a fact the answers they provide are going to hurt us deeply? It’s important to remember temporary pain vs. permanent pain are not one in the same.
I’m going to ask you here, how do you define pain; what label do you place on the emotion? Do you believe some pains are necessary for growth?
[ctt template=”3″ link=”257R4″ via=”no” ]Reality is, when we allow ourselves to dive deeper, the pain of our insecurities is inevitable. The type of pain we experience is not.[/ctt] In essence, by inviting our insecurities in, we are allowing ourselves an opportunity to heal. This is by no means the same type of pain associated with slamming the door on our insecurities; virtually, closing our eyes to certain aspects of our life which need healing. Wounds need time to heal the same way insecurities needed time to form in our lives. It is this type of inner work that is guaranteed to continually push us forward slowly but surely. Finding compassion for ourselves while working through the process; always remembering, your growth through life is not a race with anyone else’s. Time can and will heal wounds properly, some may leave scars while others a distant memory we reflect on when they show up again.
Inviting our insecurities in does not mean giving them leverage to take over + cause more damage. We are inviting them in so we can gain a better understanding of the triggers we often associate them with; an example would be in the context of our close relationships. How often have we found ourselves in recurring situations with completely different people? Simply because we haven’t taken the time to be open and honest with ourselves about our insecurities + the reasons we are choosing to make decisions based solely on their existence. We instead give them more power than they deserve by causing more levels of pain that don’t contribute to our overall healing at all. We do this by allowing insecurities to remain ingrained in us to the degree we believe we have no control over how we operate within our relationships. Therefore, causing endless cycles of pain.
[ctt template=”3″ link=”Fpkdq” via=”no” ]Cycles of pain with no healing eat away at our core being.[/ctt] Often times the pain is so deep, our refusal to acknowledge them is the very reason we remain tied to our insecurities in the first place. When I say tied, I mean in unhealthy ways reflected in how we associate ourselves with the world around us. How we often times get in our own way with the refusal to make changes we know could benefit us in the long run. How we can often talk ourselves out of the very moments that will help us move forward in our life; all events tied to our insecurities which allow control in how we operate on a day to day basis.
How many times have you sat on your own potential based on fear associated with your insecurities? How many times have you allowed the pain of the past to hinder the movements you make in the present, due to your own insecurities?
We all deal with pain. There is no way around pain. We all feel pain to varying degrees, most likely in different ways but rest assured; the pain is felt all the same. The silver lining being, we are also allowed to choose how we process through our pain. Do we tuck it? Do we mask it? Do we acknowledge it + invite it in to teach us the lessons associated with it? All optional.
I’ve learned in my life that when I run from my insecurities, I’m giving them way more power than if I decide to face them and gain clarity on why they are showing up.
Our insecurities do their very best to try and teach us; honestly and truly, they are simply doing their job. Insecurities are developed for a reason. It is our job to determine at what point we decide to stop giving them control over our life. Then from there, we are able to make the decision to thank them for doing their job + demand our control back by doing the work necessary to begin healing. For me, that healing has come in huge part from therapy; I’m aware that not everyone has the means nor desire to seek therapy. [ctt template=”3″ link=”PofYv” via=”no” ]However, you have a responsibility to yourself to decide in what ways you are willing to love yourself enough [/ctt] to do the work of healing wounds associated with the lessons your insecurities can teach you; facing your insecurities head on. Insecurities only have as much control as we allow them to have. Little by little, with each time our insecurities show up + we make the decision to face them, we regain our control over them. Undoubtedly, something to feel proud of.
Truth, our insecurities will always come knocking; they just don’t get to outstay their welcome unless we allow them to. Through each process of my healing journey, I’ve come to recognize their presence in my life. I’m able to point out why and work towards being able to move past my insecurities without allowing them anymore power than necessary for my personal growth.
Don’t be afraid to feel the pain from insecurities in the ways they are intended. Insecurities can add value to your life if you choose to use them to your advantage instead. So, the next time your insecurities decide to make an appearance in your life, start by asking questions + being open to the answers; even if the answers don’t come immediately. You will be doing yourself a service by seeking to gain knowledge, which will inevitable place you in a position to grow through what is being presented in the moments the answers do come.
Are you going to answer the door?
