At the start of this week, my mind crept into self-doubt.
It became the theme of the week, which I brought up in therapy. Self-doubt is annoying as all hell. Even when we’re doing our very best to move forward, it has a way of rearing its ugly head. Our instinct is to shut it down, silence it, run from it in whatever way lets us avoid feeling it. But in my experience, running from our feelings makes them worse + feel larger than life itself.
Self-doubt is another invitation to look at the areas of our life that are begging for our attention. It’s natural. It’s deeply human. So what do we do with it?
We acknowledge it, observe it, and give it a voice, understanding that it’s likely rooted in something from our past, buried so deep that doubt is the only language it speaks. What we don’t do is internalize it and treat it as fact. Truth be told, self-doubt is downright uncomfortable.
Think about it this way: if self-doubt were a guidebook to a better life, we’d actually use it. We’d pull it off the shelf, dust it off, and flip through the pages to figure out what we need to feel whole. We’d treat it as a tool for understanding ourselves every time it shows up.
This is where faith comes in. Faith within ourselves to seek the answers.
We get to choose how much power we give it in our overall outlook on life. We get to decide whether self-doubt wins. Faith in the process says: no, it doesn’t. Believing in ourselves even while feeling inadequate and continuing to push forward is what leads to victory. Those sweet moments when we finally see the light of our efforts reflected back, in ourselves and in the people around us.
Self-doubt convinces us it’s protecting us. Really, it just gives us a reason to stay in mental spaces that no longer serve us. But here’s the beauty: we get to decide whether staying stuck is really where we want to be. When we learn to treat self-doubt as a tool, not a final verdict, it loses its power to keep us stuck somewhere we don’t want to be.
Through prayer, patience with ourselves, and understanding who we are becoming, we reach the place within ourselves that knows self-doubt is a liar wrapped in fear. Fear of failure, yes. But more deeply, fear of failing ourselves, of disappointing the image we’ve built to present to the world. Authenticity asks us to observe our self-doubt + name it + love it through the moment we’re in, and then move forward.
There have been so many times in my life I’ve felt like I wasn’t good enough for what I was striving toward. In spite of those moments I’ve felt in my past + in the current moments when self-doubt shows up, it doesn’t get to determine my next move.
I can recall a time when I doubted I had what it takes to try a new career path. I sat inside that self-doubt long enough to almost talk myself out of the opportunity entirely. Guess what? I decided to give it a shot anyway + was accepted into a new role that took my career on a completely different path. I keep proving to myself that my destiny is not tied to doubt. Every time we choose to push past it, our ability to keep going gets stronger, and self-doubt becomes a little more of a distant memory. Over time, the episodes get fewer and further between. I’ve learned to accept self-doubt as a temporary feeling attached to a lesson in self-discovery.
Ask yourself: what is it you’re actually doubting?
I won’t lie, it’s not easy, and more often than not, you won’t like the answers. But how we respond to those answers makes all the difference in the direction we choose next.
Sometimes the answers aren’t immediate, or you can’t quite add language yet, and that’s okay. It’s easy to forget that any kind of change takes consistent time and effort to see results. Small victories deserve to be acknowledged + rewarded. Give yourself a pat on the back every time you move through moments of self-doubt. Remind yourself you’re doing the best you can, and make a promise to keep doing so consistently. Every step is worthy of praise.
Think back to a time you refused to let self-doubt win. Pull from that strength. If you need a moment to breathe and regroup, listen to that. When you’re ready, keep going.
Self-doubt is only as powerful as you allow it to be for the length of its uninvited visits. You can open the door, wish it well, and send it on its way. It won’t be happy about it, but then again, neither will you if you let it outstay its welcome.
Are you ready to deliver self-doubt its eviction papers?
